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Her


“Henry Carter: Happiness. Happiness is a word for a feeling. Feelings are rarely understood; in a moment they are quickly forgotten and misremembered.”--Shrink(Movie)
Often times people will ask or wonder about someone’s happiness, and at times make assumptions on one’s degree of happiness. In some cases people confuse companionship for happiness. And when in solitude they seek that aforementioned. . . to be happy.

I am often amazed watching couples on television, the likes of the Cosby show or Family Ties. The family seems quite content [if you notice, I didn’t use happy]. I find that in most relationships people want to project Happy, but are not quite sure what happy is.  So they set expectations, of which one of the willing participants tends to abide by until, in most cases again, they can’t quite come to terms. I’m not the happiest person in the world but I'm happy in my own ways, after all, I have had quite a good time in “this journey called life”--Prince. A lot of feelings are rarely understood, some of us do tend to build our own presumptions around feelings. To better understand is to retain the memories of the feeling. Often times we only recall the good memories when missing a moment and often time forget the bad memories.

I remember my first kiss but forget how bad the relationship ended; I recall the long walk down the crowded street but forgot the miss communication. When we play the game of happiness we often try to recall positive memories. The “when were we ever happy in our lives” become trips down memory lane of Him or Her. I think I was happy when I first had soda after not having had it in over 3 months. I was happy the first time she smiled at me in a crowded club; I was happy when I got that job with the high salary rate. All in a memory where I forgot how that walk ended; I forgot how she hung up on my call; how I got laid off because I wasn’t seniority.

Happiness is often depicted by moments in time when... Her name was.... and we …
You see, it’s a lot simpler if people try to seek internal happiness. Are you happy with the life you’ve lived up until now? Have you made the most of what you have and are you enjoying a positive life? I have seen my share of negatives and came to the conclusion that it’s easier to convince a stranger to trust you crossing the highway with them blindfolded, than it is to convince a negative thinking person to change their views.

“There is no spoon”
Few people will understand the spoon analogy--you have to change your perspective if you seek happiness. If you are often quick to think it’s everyone's fault or that the world somehow picked you out of a few billion people then you need not be alive. In happiness Adam was presumed to be lonely so God gave him, Her. Adam was happy nonetheless, but lonely according to the great book. She is not the bearer of happiness (nor the bearer of sadness, although some would argue). Rather the completion of contentment. “Happiness is a long lasting enduring enjoyment of life”--Dr. Ellen Kenner

Unless you have endured the enjoyment of life, you would not understand happiness. The happiness you seek in others will not truly make you happy. Seek in yourself and you will find what it is that makes you happy and only then can you be happy with others.


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